Starting a family early also means that you’ve completed your most intensive parenting responsibilities by the time you reach 40.

At the same time, young parenting can also be very stressful and challenging, says Stark. “Girls who have babies young find it difficult to raise a child and form this other identity when they don’t yet know who they are. In terms of life stages, the years from 18 to 22 represent a time when you learn about who you are and what you want out of life.”

A baby completely changes the lives of young parents, Stark says. And, “It’s even hard to find peers who are in the same boat and can relate.”

For young couples who have a baby then get married, statistics show that the marriage often doesn’t survive, Stark says.

“The challenge of supporting a family is hard enough for adults. It puts unusual strains on young people who have never had that kind of responsibility,” she says.

Economics also make it very difficult to properly care for children at a young age. “Depending on how much work experience or schooling a young parent has had, it can be very difficult to raise a child,” Stark says. “Many young people don’t yet have careers and find it impossible to survive on low-paying jobs.”

Those young parents who have the financial and emotional support of their family often have an easier time of adjusting to parenting, she says.

Margaret Nava has her family to thank for making raising Tony as a single parent much easier. Although she was originally living with her son’s father, who was 20 when the baby was born, he became overwhelmed by the responsibility of raising a child and left when Tony was 10 months old.

“My family lives close by and has been very supportive,” says Margaret. “If it wasn’t for the family support I’ve had, raising Tony would have been much more difficult. I would have missed out on a lot more things, like my senior prom.”

Margaret had Tony at 17, when she was in her senior year of high school. She and her son lived in her mother’s house and then with her father. Margaret and Tony moved out on their own when she was 20.

While Margaret is at work, her mother cares for Tony and Margaret pays her.

Margaret’s older brothers, Danny and Richard Serrano, also help immensely by serving as male role models for Tony.

“My brothers are there for Tony every step of the way,” Margaret says. “If he gets in trouble and I’m having a hard time dealing with him, they’ll talk to him. He really looks up to them. They also attend his soccer games when I can’t.”

Once she graduated from high school, Margaret realized that she needed to learn a trade to support herself and her son, so she attended school to become a medical assistant.

Her schedule was grueling.

From 7 a.m. to noon she worked as an phone operator. Afterward, she would return home, eat lunch and go to school from 2:30 to 7 p.m. After school she would have dinner and play with her son for a few minutes before putting him to bed. Then she would tackle her homework until about midnight.

Perhaps the hardest part of the early years for Margaret was not having any time for herself.

“I found myself getting upset, stressed and impatient, because I’d see my friends going out on the weekends and buying new clothes, and there I was doing laundry and using my money for baby stuff. I do feel there are certain things I missed during that period of my life, such as going on my senior trip and traveling,” she says.

Now that Tony is older and Margaret has a full-time job as a medical assistant in Orange, her schedule is easier, and she does find a little time for herself.

Despite the struggles Margaret has been through, she feels that she is better off today with her son than she would be if she had not had him.

“I didn’t feel like my youth was interrupted,” she says.

But knowing everything can take its toll at times, says Abigail. “My parents have gone through tough times, like all parents do, and it’s kind of hard sometimes when one of them asks me for advice about the other one,” she says.

She has seen the aftershocks of a partner having sex outside of marriage.

“When someone has an affair, it takes the specialness away from the marriage relationship and cheapens everything,” she says. “For people who desire an honest relationship, it is difficult for them to get over the betrayal, and the relationship eventually fails.

“Others stay together, but the betrayed person will close off part of himself or herself and continue to function in the relationship on a more limited basis. Only those individuals who acknowledge they have a problem and get help can overcome what happened, yet a scar always remains,” Whitney says.

Many feel the biggest casualty of infidelity is trust. “The person who was cheated on constantly questions the other person’s honesty. Questions such as ‘Did she ever love me?’ and ‘Is he really going where he says he’s going?’ are very common, natural reactions,” Whitney says. “Individuals who had the affairs also start not trusting themselves. Many people will wonder how they could have hurt someone they loved.”

National surveys indicate that between 30% and 60% of married men and women have had an affair. “Infidelity has balanced out between men and women,” Whitney says.

While it is common for anyone in a marriage or committed relationship to have fleeting thoughts about committing adultery, many people don’t act on their fantasies, she says.

Individuals who start affairs do so for a number of reasons:

* They come from a family where infidelity is common and accepted.

* They suffer from a lack of chemistry or compatibility with their partners.

* They have trouble with commitment.

Whatever the reason, the upheaval a discovered affair causes often leads to the demise of the marriage.

Just ask Estella.

When the 40-year-old graphic designer, who lives in Tustin, met her husband-to-be, he seemed like a warm father and potentially loving husband.

After three months together, Estella was madly in love and quickly agreed to marriage. One month into the marriage, though, she began finding notes on top of his dresser about meeting women for drinks.

“When I found the notes, I confronted him, and he admitted to cheating on me, saying that he was bored and didn’t feel like we were getting along,” she says. “I had thought of him like Humphrey Bogart. He had some rough edges, but there was a lot of attraction there, so we tried to work things out. But after eight months we separated because he continued to cheat on me.”

For Estella the experience took time to get over. “The first thing I did was ask myself what I’d done wrong,” she says. “Then after awhile, I realized he was a jerk. But then I began to ask myself why I picked someone like that. I ended up going through therapy over the fact that I couldn’t trust my instincts.”

“I think I’ll always be more cautious and less trusting,” she says.

With infidelity, women tend to blame themselves more often than men, says Whitney.

When Raymond’s live-in girlfriend and mother of his young son announced it was over because she was having an affair with his best friend, the 34-year-old Santa Ana teacher never considered it could be his fault.

“Things weren’t running completely smoothly, but nothing I’d done warranted that kind of drastic action,” he says.

Not only did Raymond’s girlfriend have an affair, but she thought he would stay home and watch their son while she went out. “I have no idea why she thought I would stay there while she cheated on me, but after she left, I packed up our stuff and left with my son.”

When his girlfriend returned, she called the police and Raymond returned with their son. They made arrangements for joint custody. When her new relationship didn’t work out, she asked Raymond to come back.

“To be quite honest, the last person I expected to learn from was someone half my age. Alicia has a lot of insight and maturity for a young person. She is an open, friendly person who can adapt herself to any age group.”

Flexibility and openness are two major attributes of individuals who have friends considerably younger or older than themselves, says Laguna Hills marriage, family, child counselor Vivian Clecak. “Such people aren’t caught up in stereotypes and how things appear on the outside,” she says. “They have varied lifestyles and don’t live in an age ghetto where all they meet are people of the same age and life stage.”

Having friends of varying ages gives people a richer life perspective, says Clecak, who has one friend 25 years younger and another 25 years older than herself. “Most of us live with a fairly narrow perception of the world,” she says. “Having an older friend is insightful. It gives you a model and makes the road ahead a little easier. Younger friends are also inspiring in that they allow you to recapture and maintain your sense of youthfulness. They also give you the nostalgic pleasure of reclaiming the roads you’ve already traveled.”

On the minus side, because of the age difference, there is a certain level of vulnerability involved with such friendships, says Clecak.

“When you have an older friend, you risk losing him or her to death, and younger friends’ lives sometimes change. They may move away or shift their priorities,” she says.

Despite the downside, there are many people who find large age-difference friendships fulfilling. “No matter what people look like on the outside, they can still share the same feelings and interests and appreciate life’s commonalities,” says Clecak.

*

Ever since he can remember, Roger Angle, 55, has had friends of many different ages, but it has never been intentional. “I choose my friends because of who they are, not how old they are,” he says.

Angle attributes the age differences of his friends to his constant search for interesting people. “I live a pretty isolated life,” says the unmarried Angle, who lives in Costa Mesa. “I’m always curious about people who have lives very different from my own. In some ways I think I enjoy living vicariously through my friends.”

One of Angle’s good friends is Nathan Rynn, 70, a professor of physics at UC Irvine. He and Angle met through a salon, took a liking to one another and struck up a friendship over the last year and a half. Every week they meet at a restaurant for lunch.

“Nat is a scientist who researches things that I couldn’t possibly begin to comprehend, but there are similarities in our careers,” says Angle. “My writing and his research are creative outlets that require a lot of solitary time and discovery. He’s very much in favor of research for the sake of knowledge, and I really respect his integrity. He also keeps himself in very good physical shape; I hope to be in such great shape when I’m his age.”

Rynn agrees that he and Angle have a lot in common.

“Although we lead very different lives, Roger and I have a compatible view of life,” says Rynn. “We have roughly similar ideas about things such as politics and social issues, which are the sort of things that make up the fiber of a friendship.”

Rynn says that he never had a younger friend before Angle.

“I thought I was a really open guy, but this has opened me up even more to all kinds of people and different ways of life,” he says. “I have made another younger friend since meeting Roger, and I don’t think that before I would have been open to the relationship.”

At times Rynn finds himself giving Angle advice on various matters. “I’ve already been through some of the things that Roger is experiencing, and I’m always glad to give him any help I can,” he says.

“Alicia always keeps cool when things get hectic here and calms me down when I get stressed,” says Gosnell. “She also taught me a skill that is surprising coming from someone so young–patience.”

DECIDUOUS

Most deciduous trees should be pruned during their dormant period after leaves have fallen, which is usually November, December or January. Such trees include:

* Ash (Fraxinus species)

* Birch (Betula species)

* Cape chestnut (Calodendrum capense)

* Chinese elm (Ulmus parvifolia)

* Chinese pistache (Pistacia chinensis)

* Fruitless mulberry (Morus alba)

* Ginkgo (Ginkgo biloba)

* Italian alder (Alnus cordata)

* Maple

* Sweet gum (Liquidambar styraciflua)

* Sycamore

FLOWERING TREES

Prune flowering trees when they are dormant, if they are deciduous, or immediately after flowering is completed, if they are evergreen. For those trees that bloom when they are leafless, in most cases wait until after they finish flowering. Flowering trees include:

* Acacias (various species)

* Bradford pear (Pyrus calleryana, several cultivars), which blooms while leafless

* Camellia Japonica

* Cape chestnut (Calodendrum capense)

* Cassia

* Chinese flame tree (Koelreuteria bipinnata)

* Coral trees (Erythrina caffra and other species), which bloom while leafless

* Crape myrtle

* Empress tree (Paulownia tomentosa), which blooms while leafless

* Firewheel trees (Stenocarpus sinuatus)

* Jacaranda

* Lemon bottlebrush (Callistemon citrinus)

* Purple orchid tree (Bauhinia variegata)

* Saucer magnolia (Magnolia soulangiana), which blooms while leafless

* Silk tree/mimosa ( Albizia julibrissin)

* Southern magnolia (Magnolia grandiflora)

* Tipu tree (Tipuana tipu)

BROADLEAF EVERGREENS

Broadleaf evergreens should be pruned October through March or May or June. Such trees include:

* Bronze loquat (Eriobotrya deflexa)

* Camphor tree (Cinnamomum camphora)

* Carrot wood (Cupaniopsis anacardioides)

* Eucalyptus species

* Kaffir plum (Harpephyllum caffrum)

* Oaks, including coast live oak (Quercus agrifolia) and holly oak (Quercus ilex)

* Olive (Olea europaea)

* Ornamental figs (ficus species)

* Peppermint tree (Agonis flexuosa)

* Pittosporum species, such as Victorian box (Pittosporum undulatum)

* Toyon (Heteromeles arbutifolia)

Broken hearts occur most often in one’s 20s and 30s, when people tend to try out different relationships before settling down.

“They are especially common from the ages of 28 to 33, when both men and women begin heeding the sound of their biological clock and often push relationships that just aren’t going to work,” says Heinemann, who adds that just as many women as men break hearts.

Another positive thing to be said for broken hearts is that they usually show you what type of person you don’t want to spend the rest of your life with.

“Having your heart broken is a wonderful life lesson that toughens your skin and cleans your rose-colored glasses, which helps you realize what you do want in a relationship,” says Dave, 32, a communications specialist who, like others in this story, asked that his last name not be used.

“My broken heart experiences led me to my wife, who is my soul mate, and that was worth all the pain.”

Dave’s heart was broken a few years ago after a whirlwind romance. “The relationship was pretty intense, and we both initially thought that it would go far,” says Dave, who grew up in Orange County. After a while, though, he realized that he had been changing his personality to fit her needs and that the two really weren’t that compatible.

“We went away for the weekend, and one morning we just looked at each other and without really speaking, we both knew it just wasn’t going to work out,” he says. “It was kind of a mutual decision, but it really broke my heart. The day after breaking up, I went on a weeklong road trip to sort out my feelings.”

*

While most who have done some heartbreaking agree it’s not a pleasant experience, they admit it’s less traumatic than being on the receiving end of the “it’s over” news.

“Having your heart broken is definitely more painful” than breaking someone’s, says Cynthia, 27, an employment representative for a company in Tustin. “When you break up with someone you’re in control, but when you have your heart broken, you have no control.”

Cynthia’s heart was crushed at the age of 18 by a 30-year-old architect. “He was really sophisticated and took me places I’d never been. I was madly in love with him,” she says. “He could also talk a good line. I had no idea he was sleeping with other people until I walked in on him with someone else.”

For Cynthia, the experience was heart-wrenching. “I was devastated,” she says. “I cried for days while I listened to love songs over and over again. I just really wallowed in it. It took me about six months to get over him.”

Subsequent broken hearts have been easier but are still difficult for Cynthia, whose most recent one came from a relationship with a man she’d been good friends with for 10 years. Because they have always gotten along so well, last year they decided to try dating, but the results, Cynthia says, were disappointing.

“Although we were best friends, we just didn’t have any passion,” she says, “and that broke my heart, because I’d always dreamed about someday marrying him.”

Today Cynthia says dealing with the risk of having her heart broken again has become bearable because she knows that she’ll fall in love again. “I remind myself that creating great memories is worth the pain in the long run,” she says.

*

Getting over a broken heart varies from person to person and relationship to relationship. While some people can’t get past the pain, others simply dive into work and forget.

“A couple of months into dating, he wanted to call things off because he didn’t want a serious relationship,” she says. “I was upset, because he was a nice, stable guy, with a lot of the qualities I was looking for in a man. When he told me he wanted to break up, I didn’t freak out. I remained calm and logical and told him that I didn’t think we’d given the relationship enough time. Then we went our separate ways.”

The best way to end a relationship with someone is to be honest and upfront, Heinemann says.

“Use ‘I’ statements and tell the person that you have really enjoyed his or her company and care for the person deeply, but the relationship isn’t working for you. The secret is to take full responsibility for the breakup, which keeps the person’s self-esteem intact.”

Although Denise, 33, a human resource manager, has had her heart broken a few times, she tends to be the heartbreaker. She agrees that a person’s self-esteem is the most important consideration.

“When you break up with someone, emphasize the person’s good points and then say that you don’t wish to continue the relationship,” she says. “Make a clean break. Don’t change your mind, no matter what the person’s reaction.”

Facing up to the person may not be easy, but it’s the best thing for both of you in the long run because it gives you a sense of closure, says Denise, who speaks from experience. “Unfortunately, I haven’t always taken my own advice,” she says, recalling a time when she abruptly stopped answering calls from a man she’d been dating for several months.

“We had different expectations from the get-go. He was interested in starting a family, and I just wanted a companion, so after a while I began to feel smothered by him,” she says.

On several occasions she tried to tell him that things weren’t going well for her, but she couldn’t get the words out. Finally, after she returned from a two-week vacation out of the country, she simply stopped answering his calls.

“That was definitely an uncalled-for thing to do to someone,” she says now. “He’ll always wonder what went wrong. And although that happened almost two years ago, to this day I still feel bad. I cringe when I think of running into him, because I can’t imagine what I would say.”

*

Brian, a 29-year-old engineer who is now engaged to be married, was late in appreciating an open approach in breaking off a relationship.

He ended two relationships when he abruptly stopped calling two women, one he’d been dating for 18 months. Through the grapevine he learned that he’d broken their hearts but didn’t think much of it until he had his own heart broken.

“The woman who broke up with me was upfront and told me that she was going back to her old boyfriend,” he says. “Knowing why she wanted to end our relationship really helped me deal with the breakup. At that time, I began thinking about the women I stopped calling, and I started to feel really bad about that. Now I wish I’d been more honest and open.”

There are times, however, when honesty and kindness doesn’t work.

Jim, 27, an Orange research and development manager, met a woman when he graduated from college who fell in love with him on their first date. It didn’t take him long to realize that they weren’t compatible.

“We had very different interests, and she was much more ritzy than me,” he says. “I’m more down-to-earth–like bean burritos–and she was like caviar.”

At first Jim tried to tell her nicely that things weren’t working out, but she got upset and announced that she was pregnant. When he said he’d go in for testing with her, she said she’d had a miscarriage. He then wanted to break if off, but she continued to phone him at all hours.

“I eventually started hanging up on her and not returning phone calls because I didn’t know what else to do,” he says.

Then one night she followed him to a bowling alley when he was out with a friend (who later became his wife).

“My friend told me to just go up to her and tell her off,” he says. “Although it’s against my nature to be mean, I had really had enough, and I told her so. She left, and I haven’t seen her since.”

*

Whether you’re being dumped or are doing the dumping, we are really durable creatures, says therapist Heinemann. Although someone fresh from a breakup may scoff at these words, time does indeed heal wounds.

“If you’ve had your heart broken, let it runs its course,” Heinemann says. “And if you’re going to do the heart breaking, do it right.”

“People who’ve been burglarized used to believe that their home was the last safe place, but that security has been breached and they feel violated,” Framer said.

Most burglary victims take this intrusion into their private world very personally. “For many people their home, which they see as an extension of themselves, has been penetrated and defiled, and that which was valuable, brutally taken,” said Dr. Louis West, a professor of psychiatry at UCLA.

This feeling of being violated is more common among women than men. “Some psychoanalytic studies show that many women identify their homes with their bodies,” West said. “They tend to decorate their homes in the same manner in which they dress. So, when their home is violated, they feel violated.”

Another common feeling that burglary causes is helplessness, Framer said. “If the police come and can’t find fingerprints and don’t seem to have many clues, you may think no one cares,” he said. “Even though logic tells you they deal with a lot of burglaries, emotionally you feel like yours is the special case.”

Accompanied by this feeling of helplessness is often a fantasy about seeking revenge on the person who stole from you, Framer said.

Anger is also common, said Amy Stark, a Santa Ana psychologist who specializes in child and family therapy. Her office was burglarized three times before they installed an alarm system.

“You are usually angry at a lot of people,” she said. “The jerk who stole from you, the police (where were they, anyway?), society (what’s wrong with everyone?) and yourself for not having safeguarded your property well enough.”

It is especially heart-breaking when you lose irreplaceable items during a burglary.

“Items such as artifacts, pictures and jewelry that were given to you by your parents or other significant people are links to your past, and it is very painful to lose them,” said Framer, who had a rare and valuable watch given to him by his father stolen from his home.

“Personal, nostalgic items, whether they are valuable or not, are irreplaceable,” Stark said. “Their sentimental value is immeasurable, and you will probably always be sad about losing them.”

Now Willis keeps all of her good jewelry in a safe deposit box.

Perhaps the most unsettling emotional reaction to being burglarized is fear. “Most of us think of our home as a safe castle, and it’s very frightening to have that last bastion of our security breached,” Framer said. “It’s not uncommon for burglary victims to feel unsafe and have trouble sleeping.”

For some people, sleeplessness can last a couple of weeks, while others will remain extremely vigilant and easily startled out of slumber for many months afterward. “There’s no definite timetable (for recovery), Framer said.

Whatever you do after a burglary, never minimize your feelings. “People may say to you, ‘Thank goodness you weren’t home.’ Although it is fortunate you weren’t harmed, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t feel anything,” Framer said. “You’ve been intruded upon and it’s OK to feel badly.”

To make yourself feel better after a break-in, there are several things experts suggest doing and not doing.

“While your first instinct may be to move, don’t act on that initial reaction; wait and see if you still feel that way in a few weeks,” Framer said.

Instead of wringing your hands, the best approach is to take preventive action. “Be aware and informed and educate yourself because that is likely to give you some control and power back,” Framer said.

Contact your local police and have them come out and talk to your neighborhood about burglary prevention and what you can do to make your home more secure. Form a Neighborhood Watch, which will make you feel less alone and could very well prevent future burglaries.

Another common reaction to a neighbor’s loss is becoming nervous and worrying that you’ll be next. Help yourself and your neighbors at this time of crisis by considering the following tips:

Drying flowers and foliage requires experimentation and patience. There are three basic and relatively simple approaches–air drying, glycerin absorption and silica gel crystals–each of which works best for particular types of plants. There are few hard and fast rules, and the results–like flowers–always vary somewhat.

Many gardeners love drying flowers because they can preserve some of their favorites. Doris Loeffler of Villa Park has enjoyed growing flowers for 21 years. For the past couple of years, she has dried flowers and used them to decorate items for her craft business.

“It’s really exciting to cut beautiful flowers and then wait to see how they will dry,” she says. “It’s also a lot of fun to see flowers you grew in your garden on display indefinitely in your home.”

Loeffler’s favorite flower for drying is statice, which remains bright and vivid in color. Other good dryable flowers include roses (especially two-toned varieties), larkspur, Queen Anne’s lace, lavender, coreopsis, Gaillardia red plum, sunflowers, wax flower, strawflower, heather, baby’s breath, mustard, yarrow, German statice, as well as herbs such as marjoram, oregano, mint, poppy pods and tansy.

For variety, you can also add dried plant materials such as eucalyptus, air fern and various moss, like plush velvet, sheet fern and mood moss.

Dried fruits and vegetables can even make good arrangement accompaniments. “Apricots, onions, apples and pomegranates look great with dried flowers,” says Valencia-based Chuck Durica, who is Southwest regional sales manager for Pioneer Imports, Wildflowers Across America, an importer and distributor of dried and silk flowers.

Before cutting flowers from your garden and drying them for use in your home, you should know that once the moisture evaporates, they will change in appearance, says florist Pati Gosnell, who owns Regal Flowers in Orange and teaches a dried flower arranging class.

Rose heads, for instance, shrink considerably and they change color. Deep red roses become a dark grape color, white and pink turn pale yellow and yellow becomes mustard.

In the past, dried flowers were used primarily for country decors, but they are actually a lot more versatile than that, says Johnson. “Dried flowers give a friendly atmosphere to any home. They fit in modern and Southwestern decors, and are especially attractive in Victorian, country and traditional interiors,” Johnson says.

Dried flowers can be used to soften certain atmospheres. For instance, a masculine bedroom with a lot of wood and dark colors can be softened with the placement of a few dried bouquets.

When decorating the home with dried flowers, there are a lot of things you can do. To dress up an entryway, dining room or living room, take a shallow terra-cotta pot, put in a crushed Styrofoam base and make an arrangement of roses that are various heights, Gosnell says. You may also want to add heather or German statice. Cover the base with dried fern or Spanish moss.

To make a flower basket, simply place a piece of crushed Styrofoam inside the basket and add a variety of dried flowers you have on hand. “For a country look, try using heather and mustard and adding a raffia bow,” Gosnell says.

Another attractive arrangement that’s easy to assemble is a cut-flower basket. For this, use a large oval basket and simply lay the various flowers inside as if you just cut them from the garden. “Larkspur, roses, German statice and statice, baby’s breath, heather and eucalyptus look wonderful together in such an arrangement,” Gosnell says. If you have a fireplace, a cut-flower basket looks especially nice on the hearth.

Whatever your circumstances and whomever is visiting, how well you handle having visitors depends a lot on your personality.

“The more easygoing you are, the easier it is to have guests,” says Alexandra Rosenberg, a Newport Beach clinical social worker in private practice. “If you are, on the other hand, more perfectionistic and controlling, it’s harder to have your routine broken and your space invaded.”

Even if you’re a laid-back personality, there are some inherent stresses in visits from relatives. In some cases, relationships with in-laws create havoc. In others, individuals have problems with their own families, says Ron Hirz, a psychiatrist with offices in Tustin and Lake Forest who has been working with individuals and families for 20 years.

Wendy Vallier, an Anaheim property manager and student, is becoming experienced in having in-laws as guests. She and her husband are visited twice a year by his mother, now 73, who usually stays a week; her husband’s siblings also sometimes visit.

“Having in-laws stay over is like an Olympic competition,” she says. “A great deal of preparation is required to attempt to execute a flawless performance, and through it all you pray for good marks from the judges–your in-laws. I only I only had to endure this grueling event every four years.”

Vallier, who recently became a mother, said that her mother-in-law expects a lot of attention, which has become increasingly difficult to provide.

“My mother-in-law loves Chinese checkers and no one else will play them with her, so I indulge her,” Vallier says. “The problem is, she can sit for hours playing checkers, when I’ve really had enough after about 20 minutes. The last time she was here, she just kept on playing, and I couldn’t put my daughter to bed. I had to sit there and nurse the baby while we played.”

The hardest part for Vallier of having her in-laws visit, however, is not having the familiarity she has with her own family, including an understanding of the family code of behavior.

“There are ongoing family grievances that existed long before you came into the picture you may not know about,” she says. “For instance, I said something about my husband’s sister in front of my mother-in-law, and she looked at me as if I had lost my mind. I found out later that the rest of the family never tells his mother about the things his sister does.”

Jeff McMillan, a college professor who lives in Santa Ana, has tried to avoid visits from his future in-laws but says his time is almost up.

“My girlfriend’s parents have threatened to visit and they probably will next summer,” he says. “Although I like her family, I’m not excited about their coming to stay. It’s hard to be on your best behavior for extended periods of time. We also come from completely different worlds, and once we get through the usual chitchat, I have no idea what we’ll talk about.”

Even if it’s your own family that’s staying, problems will no doubt arise.

“When our parents and siblings visit, we tend to revert to our childhood roles,” Rosenberg says. “Recently on a visit to my older sister’s, I turned into a 6-year-old and she became a 10-year-old when I asked to borrow her car and she refused. Underneath we’re all children, and situations with relatives can readily bring the kid in us out.”

Whether it’s your parents or your spouse’s family coming to visit, you can do many things to ensure that they and you have a good time.

Sharon Whatley, a writer in Tustin, has relatives from both sides of the family visit from out of state on a regular basis. After years of entertaining guests, she finally feels she has found the secret to everyone having a good time.

“When people come to visit, you aren’t their tour director,” Whatley says. “You are there to enjoy them and make them comfortable. Although you can schedule activities, it’s not up to you to completely fill their time, and most people don’t expect or want you to.”

The best way to deal with this is to gently tell the person that you are an adult and can make your own decisions, Hirz says.

“Most women and many men may look great to other people, but will quickly point out their inadequacies,” says Holly MacGowan, a marriage, family and child counselor with offices in Irvine and Laguna Beach. “We’re constantly barraged by information about how our bodies are supposed to look,” she says.

Many women’s magazines are filled with pencil-thin models and some men’s magazines picture weightlifters bursting with mountains of muscles.

“People take these images very seriously and struggle to attain these unattainable body types,” Roberts says. “The fact is, we’re all ruled by genetics. If your mother has a tendency toward wide hips, or your father has a lean upper body, then chances are you’ve inherited these traits. Working out will improve your shape, but it won’t change it.”

Rusty, a furniture store owner in Newport Beach, is an ectomorph who says being small-boned and slender isn’t without its problems.

“I’m tall and long for my bone structure and I regularly lift weights to build muscle mass, but the truth is I’ll never have a lot of curves like some women,” Rusty says. “I’ve been married for 10 years and my husband still thinks I can gain a few pounds, but it’s not possible.”

Danielle, 27, a postal carrier in Huntington Beach, is an endomorph who has learned to be comfortable with her body type.

She grew up in the shadow of her thin ectomorph sister, who is now a model.

“Even though I worked out and starved myself, I was always bigger than my sister,” she says. “I was even sent to overweight camps as a child, but nothing would make me thin like her.”

A couple years ago Danielle went so far as to consider liposuction, but couldn’t afford it. Instead she began personal training and has since experienced dramatic changes–physically and personally.

“I learned about my body type and I’ve accepted the fact that I’m not going to be a smaller person,” she says. “I’m now working with my body, not against it.”

Instead of struggling unsuccessfully to be something you’re not, condition your body to be best it can be, Roberts says.

To stay in shape in a way that is best suited to your body type, keep the following in mind:

Endomorphs

Endomorphs such as Danielle have a tendency toward round, soft, curvy bodies with more weight distributed at the hips and thighs, Roberts says. “They have small to medium-sized bones and shorter limbs relative to their trunks.”

The endomorph’s main problem is a tendency toward high body fat, which will often lead to a bottom-heavy look, Roberts says. “Fat also tends to drop off this type more slowly.”

Endomorphs who would like to enhance their shape should burn body fat three to seven days a week for 20 to 60 minutes through a combination of low to moderate intensity aerobic exercise. Good sports include low-impact aerobics, swimming, bicycling and walking, Roberts says.

When doing weight training, the endomorph should use lower weights and do higher repetitions, which will decrease body fat and make muscles more long and lean and less bulky, she says. This person should also concentrate on building the upper body, which will counterbalance the heavier bottom.

Mesomorphs

Mesomorphs have medium to large bones and well-developed and defined muscles. Of all the types, they find it the easiest to build muscle, Roberts says. They often excel at sports and can even look fit without exercising.

Public figures who fall in this category include Ginger Rogers, Jane Fonda, Barbra Streisand, Linda Evans, Demi Moore, Madonna, Linda Hamilton, John Wayne, Jerry Lewis, Elvis, President Clinton, Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Patrick Swayze and Magic Johnson.

Ectomorphs have difficulty adding muscles and curves. Although they have the lowest body weight of all types, because of their lack of muscles, they can also have a high fat-to-muscle ratio, Roberts says. Because of this overall body weakness, they are susceptible to low back problems.

For an optimum workout, you may also want to add a few inexpensive workout items that you can use in conjunction with cleaning exercises.

The best exer-cleaning workout starts with cardiovascular work and ends with strength training. To get yourself in the workout-cleaning mode, Tom suggests putting on some upbeat music.

Here’s how to get a head-to-toe workout while cleaning your house from top-to-bottom.

Cardio-Vacuum

Vacuuming is a high energy chore that is comparable to brisk walking, says Jerry Tyler, a personal trainer at the Sports Club/Irvine, where he specializes in recreation and sports conditioning. “Vacuuming not only provides you with cardiovascular conditioning, it also does a good job of working your legs and shoulders.”

To cardio-vac effectively, exaggerate your movements and change hands frequently so that you give both sides of the body a comparable workout, Tyler says.

For maximum benefit, it’s important to vacuum nonstop for at least 20 minutes and preferably more, because you don’t begin to burn fat until after 20 minutes, Tom says.

In order to get in enough cardio time, you can either vacuum and re-vacuum parts of the house, switch to another type of cardio-cleaning or try jogging in place after you finish vacuuming.

Deltoid-Dust

Make dusting an aerobic activity that will also work your arms and shoulders by quickly and briskly dusting, using not only your forearm and hand, but your entire shoulder, Tom says. “Do circular movements until the muscle starts to burn and then switch arms,” she says. So that you can continue without stopping, it might be a good idea to clear the furniture you want to dust before starting.

Workout and Wash the Car

“Washing the car will not only give you a good overall cardio-workout, if you keep moving, it will also really work your arms,” Tom says. “Just make sure to change arms frequently.”

Stair-Climb

If you have stairs in your house, they provide you with a great vehicle for working out. As a matter of fact, running steps and bleachers is often done by athletes in training, Tyler says. Doing stair work will condition your legs and give you an aerobic workout at the same time.

Keeping a steady pace, travel up and down the steps for a few minutes. To add interest, you can vary the stepping pattern and do backward and forward lunges off the bottom step, Tyler says.

When using your steps for exercise, to prevent falling, concentrate on what you’re doing and use the wall or handrail for support.

If you have no steps in your house, you may want to add to your workout by purchasing a step platform, which is used in aerobic classes. It can be used during the cardio portion of your exer-cleaning between vacuuming and dusting. The platforms cost from $80 to $130 and often come with videos.

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Once you’ve completed cardio-cleaning, it’s time to do some resistance exercises. There are a variety of chores you can do to strengthen muscles.

Firm-and-tone with the dishes

When unloading the dishwasher, instead of just bending over from the waist to reach for dishes and putting them in the cupboard, do squats, Tom says. To do these, hold the dishes close to your body, keep your back straight and lower yourself slowly to a sitting position. Wait for a second or two and then slowly stand up and put the dishes away.

Do this 20 to 40 times and you’ll give your bottom and legs a good workout.

Strength-train with the groceries

Make a weightlifting session out of bringing in the groceries and putting them away, Tyler says. “Paper bags of groceries are often good to use for exercise because most range in weight from eight to 10 pounds,” he says.

Inexpensive equipment you can buy to do more strength training in between chores includes dumbbells, which are just a few dollars a piece, depending on their weight; a barbell, which costs $20 to $30 and exercise tubing and rubber bands, which cost $2 to $10. Floor work is also a good addition to exer-cleaning. Do pushups, sit-ups and leg lifts.

This explains why night owls have a hard time falling asleep until it’s late and larks wake up early no matter what time they go to bed. “Our body temperature, not the clock on the wall, tells us when to sleep and when to wake up,” Brayford says.

“Night people aren’t lazy because they get up later, and morning people aren’t strange because they go to sleep early and wake up before most people. Both types are just in different time zones,” he says.

Late and early sleepers tend to sleep the same amount of time. For instance, a lark might go to bed at 10 p.m. and get up at 5:30 a.m., while a night owl won’t go to bed until 1 a.m. and will arise three hours later at 8:30 a.m.

“The national average for sleep requirements is 7.5 hours, although people vary in how much they need, which can range from four to 10 hours,” Mosko says.

While many night owls and larks are able to function well, some have problems meeting work and social obligations because of their sleep requirements. The good news is it is possible to reset the body’s clock.

The first step to changing your clock is charting your circadian rhythm throughout a week, Brayford says. “Write down how alert you are during each hour of the day–(the number) one being asleep and 10 being very alert. To get an accurate reading, go to bed and arise at the same time every day. By the end of the week, you should see a definite pattern.”

To change the pattern, begin rising at your desired wake-up time every morning, no matter what time you went to bed the night before or how poorly you slept. In most cases, after several weeks of doing this, your body will transition to the new sleep and wake times.

If you have difficulty adjusting to your new schedule or would like to speed the process, you can also add light treatment, Mosko says.

Researchers have found that light causes a rise in body temperature and wakes people. If your goal is to rise earlier, expose yourself to light as soon as you wake up. Those people who wish to stay up later and rise later should get light in the late afternoon.

“Sit in front of a bright light box when you wake up in the morning or in the late afternoon for 20 minutes to two hours, depending on the light’s intensity,” says Mosko, who advises people to get some instruction before using a light box.

Once you set your clock at the desired times, rigidly impose your sleep and wake times. Only stay up late when necessary, especially if you are prone to being a night owl, because the tendency is to revert readily when given the chance, Mosko says.

If you try the above methods, but can’t seem to budge your clock, you may need assistance. With more stubborn or severe cases, sleep disorders experts push a person forward or backward in three-hour time increments until they reach their desired time. For instance, a night owl would go to bed at 2 a.m. the first night, then 5 a.m., then 8 a.m. and so forth, sleeping the same number of hours each time. The pattern continues until the desired bedtime is reached.

Here are some ways to keep your biological clock set where you want it:

* Practice healthy sleep hygiene.

“To perform at your best, don’t challenge your system by constantly staying up late and getting up early. Stick to a regular bedtime and wake time as much as possible,” Mosko says.

You may even want to prepare yourself before traveling east by getting up early and exposing yourself to light several mornings before leaving. At your destination, get light in the morning whenever possible.

One of the biggest causes of body clock misalignment is constant shift work.

“Those people who work the graveyard shift during the week or intermittently are living in an inverted time zone, which can lead to health problems, sleep disorders and even fatal accidents,” Mosko says.

Experts suggest that people who do shift work stick to the same schedule throughout the week, when possible. Also try to get home before the sun comes up and sleep in a cool, dark, quiet room.

* Don’t fight your clock.

“If you feel really good when you get up at 7 a.m. and function well during the day, then try to get up at that hour every day, and you’ll be rewarded with optimum performance,” Brayford says.

According to Melody Streur, a realtor with Century 21 Academy in Tustin, the city’s sedate, low-profile atmosphere attracts people to Tustin and keeps them there.

“Once people move into the area, they tend to stay,” she said. “Residents generally have a strong sense of family and like the quiet lifestyle Tustin has to offer.”

Longtime resident Mike Sackett says his Tustin neighborhood has been quiet since the day he and his wife, Blanche, bought their four-bedroom home 36 years ago.

“It’s never been really noisy here. In the old days you’d only hear a siren when there was a fire. Today it’s still quiet,” he said.

According to Sackett, there’s always been a strong sense of community in the neighborhood as well. “The neighbors have always gotten together to help one another,” he said. “For many years the fire department was all volunteer.” Sackett, a retired meat cutter, still assists neighbors with outdoor projects.

Blanche Sackett, a former nurse, recalls the day they found the house. “We were looking for a four-bedroom home because we had two children and my mother living with us. We looked in some locations in Santa Ana, but weren’t impressed. Then we found this house–it was the model home and the last one on the tract. I remember standing in the front yard and saying, ‘I like it. What will it cost me?’ ”

They bought the 1,300-square-foot house, which sits on a third of an acre, for $13,180 in 1956. Today it would sell for about $220,000.

Besides the quiet family atmosphere, many residents choose to stay put in Tustin because of the area’s highly rated high schools. In recent years both schools in the Tustin Unified School District, Tustin High School and Foothill High School, have produced a number of National Merit Scholars. This is an academic honor awarded to selected students throughout the nation.

“At Tustin High, approximately 90% of students go on to college,” said school Principal Duffy Clark. “In the last 10 years we’ve sent more students to West Point than any other high school west of the Mississippi.”

Foothill High is well known to Orange County for its academic programs. Part of this has to do with parent support and involvement. According to Jones, the Foothill Education Fund, which is run by parents, has raised over $200,000 for various state-of-the-art science and computer equipment that many other schools don’t have.

A quiet, friendly atmosphere and excellent schools are just two of the reasons people stay in Tustin. Another is its central location. Tustin is a short distance from shopping, beaches and even the airport–it is just eight miles from John Wayne Airport and 12 miles from the beach. Tustin is bounded by Jamboree Road on the east, Chapman Avenue on the north, the Costa Mesa (55) Freeway on the west and Barranca Parkway on the south.

As far as house cost and size, Tustin has a wide range, offering something for just about anyone. According to Streur, the average home in Tustin sells for $349,000 for a three- to four-bedroom home of 2,200 to 2,800 square feet with 2 to 2 1/2 bathrooms. The area also boasts estates of 4,000 to 10,000 square feet with many amenities such as tennis courts and horse property. These homes run $500,000 to $2 million or more. On the other end of the spectrum are three- to four-bedroom homes of 1,200 to 1,700 square feet that run $195,000 to $225,000. And there are two- to three-bedroom condos that average $153,000 for 1,000 to 1,500 square feet.

Many longtime residents of Tustin look back on the 1950s as a great time to live in the city. “It was beautiful here then,” said Hugh Robinson, a retired Marine and UC Irvine facilities department supervisor. In 1956 he and his wife, Marion, bought a three-bedroom home in the area for $18,000, which would sell for about $200,000 today.

EROGENOUS ZONE

This store carries a lot of specialty nightwear, says salesperson Lelania McDaniel, including a Classics by J & J 100% silk two-piece shirt and pants set. The shirt is long-sleeved with one pocket. The outfit is loose fitting and comes in red or white ($120, sizes small, medium and large).

The store also has an XTC Leather teddy, which McDaniel says is “very sexy.” This is sleeveless with lace on the front and spaghetti straps. It comes in black and has attached garter straps ($80-$110, sizes 34-38).

The Loves Delight baby-doll short teddy has connecting nylon shorts. The nightie comes in black or white and has spaghetti straps and a fishnet and lace top ($24, sizes small, medium and large).

343 N. State College Blvd., Fullerton, (714) 879-3270.

INTIMATE CONCEPTS

This store carries a lot of revealing nightwear, including the Shirley of Hollywood 100% stretch lace teddy. This tight-fitting sleeveless sleepwear has a lace-up front and low V-neck. It comes in black, red or white ($26, sizes small to 4X).

The store also has an Empire 100% chiffon baby-doll set. The spaghetti-strap top is sheer black with lace and embroidered red roses. There are matching sheer black panties ($25, sizes small to 4X).

The Shirley of Hollywood sleeveless form-fitting body stocking is made of cracked-ice fishnet and comes in purple, black or white. There is lace up the front and a very low back ($49, sizes small, medium and large).

5406-A Walnut Ave., Irvine, (714) 262-1010.

KRISTEN’S LINGERIE

This store carries a wide variety of women’s sleepwear, including a Varena floor-length white cotton nightie. The gown has a round neck with buttons down to the bust line. At the hem there are small white cotton bows. Available in small, medium and large and petite by special order ($90). A matching robe with long sleeves gathered at the wrist is sold separately ($115).

The Tzzz 100% cotton pajamas come in pink, sea-foam green or blue with white polka dots. The top is a short-sleeved pullover with a white organdy flower at the neck, and the bottoms are shorts. You can find small, medium and large sizes ($30).

The store also carries Treesha and Lasoie Charmeuse night slips in peach, shocking pink, purple or red. These pullover slip-style nighties have a scoop front and low back with spaghetti straps. They fall knee-length or mid-calf ($20 to $60, depending on the mummy–weight and quality–of the silk).

LEONARDO’S BOUTIQUE

This store carries a wide variety of women’s nightwear, including a Blanche long, white chiffon gown. The top part has spaghetti straps and is made of sheer lace, and the bottom half is composed of pink chiffon. There is an accompanying short-sleeved jacket, also in white lace and pink chiffon. Both are ankle-length and loose fitting ($180, for the set, one size).

The Circa 2000 teddy has a bold Hawaiian flower print in yellow, red, blue and pink. The 100% chiffon nightwear flairs out at the hips, giving a ruffle-like appearance. There are spaghetti straps ($30, sizes small, medium and large).

The store also carries a Nan Flower teddy that Sullivan says looks like a bathing suit. This comes in red, pink or blue and has a satin V on the stomach, mesh on the sides and lace at the bikini line and on the top. There are spaghetti straps and a snap crotch ($37; small, medium and large).

300 Plaza Alicante, Hyatt Hotel, Garden Grove, (714) 740-0307.

LINGERIE FOR LESS

These stores carry brand-name nightwear at 20% to 70% less than many department and specialty stores, says Santa Ana store manager Michelle Liger.

The silk knee-length Cassi L chemise with a scoop neck has spaghetti straps and a crisscross back. It comes in solid red, white, black or blue and is available in small, medium and large ($30). Pair this with a matching silk kimono robe made by the same maker. This is also knee-length and has a loose tie belt ($55).

The stores also carry a Sarah Jane two-piece cotton pajama short set in a paisley or floral pattern of soft peach, blue and green. The shorts are trimmed in lace ($14).

The Terry Rousso ivory-colored gown and robe set has a “bridal look to it,” says Sulahian. The spaghetti-strap gown is lace and chiffon and the kimono-style robe is also chiffon. Both have beading and come in small, medium and large sizes ($80 for the set).

Here you can plant tomatoes from March through August and enjoy them fresh most of the year.

“Orange County has been described as having just two seasons–spring and summer,” says Garofalow. “Our summer lasts from July through September; at this time warm-weather crops like cucumbers and tomatoes thrive. Spring composes the rest of the year. Many people don’t realize that this latter time can be very active in the garden.”

In March, both spring and summer crops can be planted.

“It’s possible to plant cool-weather vegetables now and get a crop in before the summer plants take over,” says James Bailey, coordinator and supervisor of the Centennial Farm at the Orange County Fair. Good picks are beets, broccoli, cabbage, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, mustard greens, snow peas, spinach, artichokes, rhubarb and celery.

While your late winter/spring crop is growing, you can also begin seeding plants such as corn, cucumbers, tomatoes, eggplants, bell peppers, turnips, shallots, peanuts, melons, watermelons, pumpkins, summer squash, winter squash, zucchini and beans. Many seeds planted now will be ready for transplanting into the garden in a month or two.

Plants that can be grown any time of year here include lettuce, radishes, most herbs, Swiss chard, collards and carrots, says Gary Hayakawa, co-owner of Three Star Nursery in Fountain Valley, which raises vegetable and bedding plants year round.

If being able to pick fresh produce from your yard every day of the year sounds appealing, here are a few things to keep in mind.

For year-round gardening, most experts suggest sticking to a small, manageable plot, rather than a large, sprawling garden.

“You don’t want to waste a lot of time and effort on more square footage than you need,” says Huntington Beach resident Paul Pirtle, who has gardened on a year-round basis for several years. “It’s easier to control a smaller space and it’s less intimidating.”

In hard clay soil, many gardeners turn to raised beds because the soil is always loose and workable and drains easily. A raised bed also gives you a confined space in which to plant. Pirtle has five six-by-three-foot raised beds, one of which is always full of lettuce.

A trellis system for climbing plants such as peas, beans and melons should also be added to your garden, says Garofalow. Put a trellis at the back of the garden so that the structure or attached plants don’t shade other crops. Many gardeners secure concrete reinforcing wire between two-by-twos or metal stakes and use this as a trellis, which will last for several years.

For the active gardener, a compost pile is worth its weight in gold. If you don’t already have one, start a compost system and add the resulting humus to your garden at least once or twice a year.

Garofalow also suggests replenishing your soil with blood meal, which is high in nitrogen, and bone meal, which is a good source of phosphorus. A good time to apply blood meal is before you plant each new crop; bone meal should be applied about twice a year.

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If part of your garden will be dormant over the winter, you can build the soil by planting a green cover crop in the fall, which will grow during the winter and can be turned into the soil in the spring, says Pirtle. This re-energizes your garden by adding nitrogen and organic matter.

To avoid a barrage of vegetables at one time and ensure a continual harvest, get accustomed to having a lot going on at once, says Pirtle. This means you should always have seeds germinating, seedlings growing and established plants producing.

Beets, bell peppers, carrots, collards, corn, eggplant, endive, herbs, kale, kohlrabi, leeks, lettuce, mustard greens, onions, parsley, parsnips, potatoes, peanuts, peas, radishes, rhubarb, Swiss chard, salsify, spinach, sunflowers, tomatoes (“Early Girl” variety), turnips.

Transplant and/or harvest

Artichokes, asparagus, beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, collards, endive, horseradish, Jerusalem artichokes, kale, lettuce, peas, radishes, rhubarb, Swiss chard, turnips, spinach.

APRIL

Seed and/or transplant

Beans, beets, bell peppers, cantaloupe, carrots, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, endive, jicama, lettuce, lima beans, melons, New Zealand spinach, okra, onions, parsley, parsnips, peanuts, potatoes, pumpkins, radishes, salsify, squash, sunflowers, Swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips, watermelon.

Harvest

Beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, radishes, Swiss chard, turnips.

MAY

Seed and/or transplant

Beans, beets, bell peppers, carrots, cantaloupe, collards, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, endive, herbs, kale, leeks, lettuce, lima beans, mustard greens, okra, onions, parsley, parsnips, peanuts, potatoes, pumpkins, radishes, salsify, squash, tomatoes, melons, sunflowers, Swiss chard, turnips, watermelon.

Harvest

Beets, cabbage, carrots, endive, garlic, herbs, kale, leeks, lettuce, mustard, parsley, peas, shallots, Swiss chard.

JUNE

Seed and/or transplant

Beets, bell peppers, carrots, chayote, collards, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, endive, herbs, lettuce, lima beans, melons, New Zealand spinach, onions, radishes, salsify, snap beans, sunflowers, squash, Swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips, watermelons.

Harvest

Carrots, collards, cucumbers, eggplant, endive, herbs, lettuce, onions, peppers, potatoes, radishes, Swiss chard, squash, tomatoes, turnips.

JULY

Seed

Beets, carrots, celery, collards, endive, lettuce, New Zealand spinach, onions, peppers, potatoes, radishes, sunflowers, Swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips.

Transplant and/or harvest

Beans (fast maturing type), beets, bell peppers, carrots, collards, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, herbs, lettuce, melons, onions, parsnips, peppers, potatoes, radishes, salsify, sunflower seeds, squash, Swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips,

AUGUST

Seed

Beets, cabbage, carrots, endive, leeks, lettuce, mustard, onions, parsley, potatoes, radishes, rutabaga, snow peas, Swiss chard, turnips.

Transplant and/or harvest

SEPTEMBER

Seed

Beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, celery, collards, endive, garlic (sets), kohlrabi, kale, leeks, lettuce, mustard greens, onions, parsnips, peas, potatoes, radishes, rutabaga, salsify, spinach, Swiss chard, turnips.

Transplant

Bell peppers, celery, herbs, lettuce, Swiss chard, tomatoes with short growth cycle.

Harvest

Beans, bell peppers, corn, cucumbers, eggplant, melons, peanuts, potatoes, pumpkins, squash, tomatoes, watermelon.

OCTOBER

Seed and/or transplant

Artichokes, asparagus, beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, celery, collards, comfrey, endive, garlic, horseradish, kohlrabi, kale, leeks, lettuce, mustard greens, onions, parsley, parsnips, peas, radishes, rhubarb, rutabaga, salsify, shallots, spinach, Swiss chard, turnips.

Harvest

Bell peppers, carrots, eggplant, endive, leeks, parsley, peanuts, radishes, Swiss chard, turnips, tomatoes.

NOVEMBER

Seed and/or transplant

Artichokes, asparagus, beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, cauliflower, carrots, celery, endive, garlic (sets), horseradish, Jerusalem artichokes (tubers), kale, kohlrabi, lettuce, mustard greens, onions, parsley, parsnips, peas, radishes, spinach, scallions, Swiss chard, rutabaga, rhubarb, turnips.

Harvest

Beets, bell peppers, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, cauliflower, celery, eggplant, endive, lettuce, mustard greens, parsley, potatoes, radishes, spinach, Swiss chard, tomatoes, turnips.

DECEMBER

Seed, transplant and/or harvest

Artichokes, asparagus, beets, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, celery, endive, garlic sets, horseradish, kohlrabi, leeks, lettuce, mustard greens, onions, parsley, parsnips, peas, potatoes, radishes, rhubarb, rutabaga, salsify, spinach, Swiss chard, turnips.

“I have a 110-mile commute that takes three to four hours each day,” she says. “Dancing is a great form of exercise that helps relieve stress. As you concentrate on where your feet are supposed to go, you forget about the daily grind. It’s also easy to fit dancing into my hectic schedule.”

There are many types of dancing that can become part of a fitness program. Each offers the opportunity for a particular type of workout.

*Hip-hop. Just listen to the up-tempo music for this funky brand of street dancing and you can tell it provides a really good workout, says Christina Sullivan, director and choreographer for the Jam Crew, a professional hip-hop dance company based in Newport Beach. “Hip-hop is a very intense type of dancing that elevates your heart rate very quickly,” she says.

Because hip-hop can be complicated, Sullivan suggests taking a funk or hip-hop aerobics class to learn some of the basic moves before hopping onto the dance floor.

*Country and Western. There are two main types of country dancing, the two-step and line dances. Considered the traditional country dance, the two-step is performed with a partner and gives you a good upper and lower body workout, says Robbin.

Line dancing is also popular. The tush push and electric slide are two routines that appeal to a variety of people because they can be done to rock, country rock or up-tempo country. This dancing is done in lines, and you generally don’t need a partner, which means you don’t get much of an upper body workout, says Robbin.

Many clubs offer complimentary classes in the early evening before the band starts twanging.

*Ballroom dancing. There are two main categories of ballroom dancing, one of which includes smooth dances like the fox-trot, waltz, and tango. “Although these use a slower, flowing music and seem mellow, they require that you have great control over your body and can give you a really good workout,” says Brayshaw.

There are also ballroom rhythm dances such as the popular East and West coast swings and Latin dances such as the mambo, cha-cha, lambada and salsa. These dances can be done to many different kinds of music to give as strong a workout as desired.

*Square dancing. This vigorous form of exercise is great for cardiovascular conditioning and is even recommended to heart patients by many doctors, says Don Stewart, a square dance caller and instructor based in La Habra. “The dances last from two to 2 1/2 hours, and you get a really good workout,” he says.

*Free-style. If learning dance steps doesn’t appeal to you, then letting your limbs loose with free-style is probably the answer. The good thing about this type of dancing is that you can do it to just about any kind of music.

“Free-style dancing can be a great way to get an aerobic workout,” says Sullivan. “Just don’t stay rooted to one spot on the dance floor. Put your whole body into it and let yourself go, making the movements really exaggerated.”

As a form of exercise, you get out of dancing what you put into it. Here are some ways to make the most out of your time on the dance floor:

*Watch the clock. If burning fat is one of your objectives, Sullivan says to dance as much as possible. Try dancing for at least 20 minutes at a stretch once or twice throughout the evening. If you get tired, take a break, but make it brief so that your heart rate remains elevated.

*Drink water. Rather than drinking alcohol, which will dehydrate you and eventually deplete your energy, drink a lot of water, especially if you’re sweating a lot.

“Fill a coffee can with dirt from four locations in the yard and bring it to your local nursery. They’ll have a soil and plant lab test it for about $50,” said Kawaratani. “Or spend $15 to $16 on an easy to use testing kit which can also be found at your local nursery.”

Testing your soil is useful because it clues you in to a number of critical things, including the fertility of the soil. It also measures pH, which will tell you how acid or alkaline your soil is.

“Most plants thrive in a soil pH of about 5.5 to 6.5, with 7.0 being neutral,” said Kawaratani. “Because we receive most of our water from the Colorado River, which is highly alkaline, our soil tends to be about 7.9 to 8. When pH is this high, plants are likely to be stunted, especially acid-lovers like gardenias, camellias and azaleas.”

A test will also indicate the salt content of your ground, which is critical because salt can be deadly to plants. “Excess salt often burns root ends which creates a favorable environment for fungi and bacteria,” said Kawaratani. “The roots then seal off and can no longer uptake water and you’ve got a case of root rot.”

Amending your soil with the right ingredients before planting will lighten the soil and give you better drainage and air penetration. This will prevent root rot and encourage rapid, healthy plant growth. It will also adjust the pH, decrease the salt content and add nitrogen.

“The most efficient conditioner for clay soil is redwood compost,” said Steve Hollister, CCN, manager of the Armstrong Garden Center in Irvine. He recommends two to three bales per 100 square feet.

“This may seem like a lot of amendment, but it takes a great deal of conditioner to change soil structure,” he said.

“When preparing soil for a lawn, work the compost into the first eight inches,” advised Hollister. “With shrubs and trees, dig a hole 1 1/2 to two times the existing root ball. Then combine the soil you’ve removed with a comparable amount of redwood, mix the two together, and put it back in the hole with the plant,” said Hollister.

Redwood compost is a byproduct of the lumber industry and can be found at your local nursery for $8 to $9 a bag.

Planter mix is another commonly used amendment, although Kawaratani says that redwood compost is preferable because it lasts longer–up to six or seven years in the ground.

Other amendments that help clay soil include gypsum, which is calcium sulfate. This flushes out salts and lightens the soil by making the soil particles larger. Kawaratani recommends adding 150 to 200 pounds of gypsum per 1,000 square feet. To lower the pH, add soil sulfur or try gypsite, which is a combination of sulfur and gypsum.

Another helpful product is Ironite, which adds a combination of iron and sulfur. “Iron is also often deficient in alkaline soils,” said Hollister.

Before using any of these products, look closely at package directions and contents. “It’s best to use just one or two of these products so that you don’t get ingredient duplication,” he said. “For instance, you wouldn’t want to add Ironite and gypsite, because they both contain sulfur.”

Perlite is another amendment that helps break up the soil. This is a popcorn-like product that doesn’t decompose. It helps aerate the soil and holds soil particles apart. On its own it isn’t a sufficient soil conditioner and should be added in conjunction with redwood compost or planter mix.

To make sure that root rot is the problem, it is best to perform a simple test. Get a professional soil probe or any long metal tube and push it down into the soil near the plant. You want to remove dirt from near the root zone.

* incense cedar

Potassium loss also occurs when you sweat. “Replace potassium after a day at the beach by drinking a glass of orange juice or apricot nectar or by eating a banana, raisins, potatoes, yogurt or any milk product,” says Posada. Berries, melons, cantaloupe, oranges and peaches are other good choices.

At times, magnesium is also lost during sweating. This can be replaced by eating whole-grain breads and cereals.

During exercise, glucose stores, which give us energy, are also depleted. They too can be replaced through food.

Follow a nutritionally savvy summer meal plan, and you can replenish your body with vital nutrients lost during summer activities. Just keep in mind the following tips:

* Stick to carbohydrate-rich foods. During and after an active summer day, replenish your glucose stores by snacking on carbohydrates.

“Within the first two hours after an active day at the beach, eat about 300 calories worth of carbohydrates,” says Posada. Snacks she suggests include a cup of orange juice and a bagel; a bowl of cereal with a banana; two cups of cranberry juice and eight ounces of yogurt; 1 1/2 cups of pasta topped with tomato sauce; a turkey sandwich and large piece of fruit; a hamburger and fruit, and a bean burrito with tomato and carrot sticks on the side.

* Stay away from nutrition-poor snacks. “Because the weather is hot and our schedules often change, we tend to graze in the summer rather than sitting down to balanced meals,” says Posada. “Many people will snack on potato chips or sugary items like Popsicles, which have little nutritional value.

“Eating such foods is fine in moderation as part of a balanced diet, but they shouldn’t make up the bulk of what you eat during the day,” she says. “You’ll lose out on nutrition and will probably feel tired.”

* Remember the four basic food groups. “During summertime we often forget to eat a well-balanced diet,” says Posada. “At each meal or snack, make sure you eat two or three items from the four basic food groups.

From the milk group, adults should have two servings and children three to four servings a day; the grain group, five to 11 servings; the fruit and vegetable group, five to nine servings and the meat/fish/poultry/eggs/nuts group, two servings.

“Each of the food groups provide us with essential nutrients,” says Posada. “The vegetable and fruit group gives us Vitamins A and C and fiber; the milk group calcium, riboflavin and protein; the meat/fish/poultry/eggs/nuts group, protein and iron, and the grain group thiamine, niacin, iron and riboflavin.”

* Don’t be afraid of starch. “Foods such as potatoes, rice, pasta and breads have really gotten a bad rap,” says Daversa.

“Many people think you get fat eating those foods, but the truth is they contain no fat. They are a rich source of carbohydrates and an important part of any diet. What makes these foods fattening is what you put on top of them, such as margarine on toast, sour cream on baked potato and rich cheesy sauces on pasta.”

There are many topping alternatives, says Daversa. “Buy seasoning packets and add them to nonfat or low-fat cottage cheese, nonfat yogurt or soft curd tofu, and you’ve got some great low-fat toppings for potatoes,” she says. “For pasta and rice, try vegetable sauces, marinara and vegetable stir fries.” The latter is great with a little fresh Parmesan cheese sprinkled on top

When fresh produce isn’t available, use frozen instead of canned whenever possible.

Store dried catnip in tightly sealed plastic bags in a dry place.

Come wintertime when it’s rainy and cold outside, you can perk your cat up by placing dry catnip in the toe of a sock.

A cat garden can also make a colorful display. Felines enjoy attractive edible flowers such as zinnias, marigolds and Johnny-jump-ups, as well as catnip, cat thyme, oat grass, rosemary and bean sprouts.

Although catnip has a reputation as a cat favorite, you might want to try some on your cat before you plant it, because not all cats like it. It’s important to try fresh catnip; dried taste differently.

“Some cats take to catnip and some don’t,” says Mary Lou Heard of Heard’s Country Gardens in Westminster. She says cat thyme is very similar.

One plant that just about all cats like is oat grass, she says. “When cats are hungry for chlorophyll, they eat grass.”

Adds Slater, “The good thing about oat grass is that it doesn’t have serrated edges or rough foliage, so cats are less likely to vomit after ingesting it.”

For your cat’s safety and economy’s sake, it’s often a good idea to raise plants from seed. That way you know that the plants haven’t been treated with any harmful chemicals, and you’re not spending a great deal of money on plants that often need to be replaced regularly.

“You can start just about all of the plants that cats like from seed,” says Heard, who suggests planting seeds in containers.

She makes a mixture of one-third potting soil, one-third peat moss and one-third vermiculite and then sprinkles seeds on top. So that the seeds don’t wash away, water from the bottom or spray the top with a fine mist. If the container is outside, cover the seeds with a thin layer of peat moss so that birds don’t eat them.

“Place the container in an area that gets partial light and watch it closely, because you don’t want the seeds to dry out even for an hour–they will die,” says Heard.

“Put the container in a plastic bag, blow it up and seal it shut,” she says. “When the seedlings come up, remove the bag immediately or the plants could get a deadly fungus.”

This shortcut is especially helpful for slow germinating seeds such as parsley, which can take two to five weeks to germinate, and carrots which don’t pop up for one to three weeks.

Nola Skyler of Huntington Beach, a member of the Orange County Horticultural Society, speeds the germination time of carrots by soaking them first. “They have a tough thick hull and this seems to soften them up,” she says.

Oat grass comes up in just a couple of days, and catnip and spinach only take about a week. Rosemary and cat thyme are usually started from root cuttings of other plants, so you want to obtain them as whole plants.

It’s a good idea to continually reseed the plants cats like to eat. Slater suggests planting new oat grass every two to three weeks so your cat will have a constant supply of tender sprouts.

For catnip, Heard suggests having two containers of the plant. One can rejuvenate while the other is being eaten and played with by the cats.

“Catnip will come back to life,” says Heard. “Just cut out the bad parts and give it some time; it will grow full again.”

When choosing plants for your cat garden, remember that some plants are poisonous. Oleander, for instance, is deadly. “Just one leaf can kill a cat and even a person,” says Slater, who suggests not having any oleander in your landscape if you have a cat.

“Oleander is very oily. Your cat could lie near the plant and then lick his fur,” she says.

Other poisonous plants to avoid include poinsettias, yew, lily of the valley, philodendron, azalea, bulbs, sweat pea, jimson weed, dieffenbachia, large leaf ivy, mistletoe, cherry, morning glory, iris, mushrooms and rhubarb leaves.

You don’t need a large yard to have a cat garden. Use some imagination when choosing a site. Slater put her cat garden in a side walkway. It uses one wall of the house, which is where the cat door is located.

“Satisfying a craving sometimes releases a peptide in the brain that will in turn release mood-elevating chemicals that cause you to feel calm and content,” says Daversa.

Although we are all individual in our tastes, according to Daversa, there are a number of commonly craved foods. On the sugary side, candy bars top the list, followed by other sweets such as cookies, pies, cakes, hard candy and ice cream. For salty sensations, people look to potato chips, sunflower seeds and a host of packaged foods.

Mosing also finds that people usually go one of two ways when it comes to food texture.

“Some people like ‘comfort’ foods that are creamy and smooth, such as puddings, soups and even grits and creamy cookies,” she says. “Other individuals prefer crunchy foods that make a lot of noise such as chips, popcorn, pretzels and raw fruits and vegetables.”

Women are more likely than men to crave foods, according to Daversa. Hormonal changes before menstruation cause many women to seek out calming and sedating foods. At that time, “many women crave simple sugars, especially chocolate, which temporarily helps relieve symptoms such as mood swings and anxiety,” says Daversa.

“Simple sugars make it easier for the amino acid tryptophan to cross the blood-brain barrier. Tryptophan is a precursor to serotonin, a neurotransmitter that gives you a calm, sedated feeling,” she says. “There is also fat in chocolate, which makes you feel satisfied.”

The problem with eating simple sugars found in sweets and even white breads and most convenience items is that their effects are temporary, and after a while you’ll feel lethargic.

“After eating sugar, you’ll feel good for a while, but then your blood sugar will drop and you’ll feel sluggish,” says Mosing.

You know the feeling: It’s the middle of the afternoon and all you can think about is something sweet. According to dietitians, there are ways to deal with cravings and still enjoy a treat now and then:

* Find healthful alternatives.

“If you have crunchy cravings, go for fruits and vegetables, or if that doesn’t work, try air-blown popcorn, bread sticks or whole-grain crackers,” says Mosing. “For creamy foods, there is a wide variety to choose from such as sugar-free puddings, the new fat-free cream soups, oatmeal and hot cereals.”

* Stick to complex carbohydrates. Avoid that tiring simple sugar rush by eating complex carbohydrates such as whole-grain breads, crackers and cereals, pasta, brown rice and vegetables. These foods take longer to turn into glucose than simple sugars and as a result are released more slowly into the bloodstream, which keeps your blood sugar stabilized and you feeling energetic.

* Offset carbohydrates with protein.

“While carbohydrates sedate you, proteins make you more alert. It slows the rate at which carbohydrates turn into glucose,” says Daversa. Try also eating such foods as string cheese or nuts or drink a glass of milk.

* Plan for cravings.

“If you know you’re going to have a craving, bring along healthy alternatives that you can reach for instead of that candy bar or bag of chips,” says Daversa.

* Give in to your cravings at times. We can’t eliminate all those goodies we crave, and experts don’t suggest we try.

“Eating a craved food occasionally won’t harm you,” says Mosing. ‘It’s actually preferable to eat one candy bar, rather than becoming obsessed about it.”

Some women are anemic and in need of iron supplements. During pregnancy, women can even display iron deficiency by eating such bizarre things as paint, clay, dirt and laundry detergent. Ice cravings also indicate an iron shortage. Such unusual cravings are rare and generally found among disadvantaged women.

There are two general types of snow peas: bush and climbers. The bush are a short variety, while the climbers can grow up to 6 feet or more and need to be trellised.

At this time of year, one can find pea seeds and plants in nurseries. Before planting, make sure to properly prepare the bed.

“Although peas aren’t picky, like any plant they need well-drained soil,” says Scott Lathrop, general manager of Flowerdale Nursery in Santa Ana. “The clay soil found here should be amended with compost or planting mix to loosen it.”

If you are using seeds, you must also prepare them. Do this by soaking them in warm water overnight for at least six to 12 hours, which will hasten the germination time. When planting the seeds, push them in 1 or 2 inches deep and 4 to 6 inches apart.

Once your seeds start to germinate, protect them from birds by covering them with netting, row cover or some other protective barrier until they are larger.

When the plants are young, they are also susceptible to garden pests such as sow bugs, snails, cutworms, caterpillars and slugs. To prevent cutworms, you can place paper collars around the base of every plant, but Tinkle says this can be time-consuming and suggests “zapping them with BT, which is found in the products Attack and Dipel.”

Tinkle also keeps bugs away from his plants by placing a band of wood ash around them. “There is potash in the ashes, which will kill (many pests),” he says.

If you’re growing the climbing variety of peas, you need to provide them with a trellis. There are many things you can use for this purpose, including chicken wire and wood fencing.

“I normally recommend Ross Grownet, which is netting that can be attached to stakes,” says Lathrop. “Pea plants readily grow on this, and it can be easily stored once the season is finished.”

When it comes to fertilizing, many experts say peas don’t need much. “One application of fertilizer two weeks after planting is sufficient,” says Nola Skyler, vice president on the board of directors for the UCI Arboretum and editor of the Orange County Horticultural Society’s newsletter.

Tinkle, on the other hand, believes that peas do better with a little more fertilizing.

“When planting peas, I first dig down 8 inches and put a slow-release fertilizer in the soil, such as chicken manure, or anything that is blood meal-based,” he says. “When the plants are about 6 inches high, the roots reach the fertilizer.”

Peas need a continuous supply of moisture, so give them a good soaking on a regular basis. Don’t give them too much water, though, because they’re susceptible to root rot. And never water from overhead; they are prone to mildew.

If you do have mildew, Tinkle suggests nipping it in the bud by spraying the plants with a mixture of fine ground sulfur and water. He mixes a teaspoon to a quart and sprays it on after the sun has gone down, rinsing it off the next morning.

Store-bought carrots taste like cardboard next to the home-grown variety. Pull one of these tender vegetables out of your garden and you’re likely to eat it right then and there.

You won’t find carrot plants in the nursery, because they must be planted as seed and cannot be transplanted.

“Before planting, do a really good job of preparing your carrot bed,” says Skyler. “If your soil is too hard, you will have stunted carrots. The hard earth may even cause them to push themselves out of the ground, and they will become dry and tasteless.”

Skyler has raised beds, which she says are ideal for carrots because the soil is loose. If you don’t have raised beds, cultivate your soil well, adding compost or planting mix.

According to Mike Graupner, editor of the California Organic Gardening Club newsletter and past president of the group, carrots also have difficulty germinating in Southern California because our soil and water is highly alkaline.

“I generally recommend 3 to 4 cubic feet of planting mix per 100 square feet,” says Chuck Bybee, manager of Armstrong Garden Center in Santa Ana.

You will also want to boost the nutrient level of the soil before planting.

“Brassicas are heavy nitrogen feeders,” Denham says. “To increase nitrogen in your soil, add organic products such as blood meal or any type of aged manure such as guinea pig, steer, horse, rabbit or chicken.”

You can also buy granule or liquid fertilizers which have high nitrogen contents.

Although all three of these plants are very similar in appearance and growth habits, they each have individual needs that you should keep in mind.

“Broccoli is one of the easiest brassicas to grow,” Bybee says. “It is more heat tolerant and tends to bolt less than Brussels sprouts or cauliflower.” (Bolting refers to the plant producing small yellow flowers. When this happens the taste of the vegetable suffers.)

Broccoli is grown for its cluster of green flower buds and tender stems. The plant grows about 3 feet tall with an equal spread. “The tip of the main stem develops the largest cluster of buds,” Van Dellen says. “This is usually about 6 inches in diameter when ready to harvest.”

Cut broccoli’s main head with a knife about 6 inches beneath the cluster of buds. The main head won’t come back, but the plant is through producing. It will grow smaller side shoots which can be harvested for another 8 to 10 weeks.

To keep broccoli productive, Van Dellen says to fertilize when the plant is 6 to 8 inches, 12 to 15 inches and 2 1/2 to 3 feet high. The fertilizer should have a 5-10-10 ratio of nitrogen, phosphorus and potassium.

Unlike broccoli, cauliflower produces only one head. Stagger plantings to keep a steady supply throughout the growing season.

Cauliflower is a little more difficult to grow than broccoli. “It likes a cooler season and shouldn’t be planted until hot weather has passed,” Bybee says.

This vegetable usually grows about 2 1/2 feet tall by 2 1/2 feet wide. “It also requires frequent fertilization every two to three weeks,” Van Dellen says. “Use a fertilizer that contains a 10-10-10 ratio. When applying the fertilizer be very careful, however, because cauliflower roots are close to the surface and easily injured.”

Brussels sprouts, those bite-size morsels that look like small cabbages, are probably the most challenging of the three plants to grow. They also require cool weather, producing loose sprouts when the weather is warm.

The Brussels sprout plant grows very tall, reaching at least 2 feet and sometimes 3 to 4. The sprouts form along the stalk, developing at the base first and working their way up.

When harvesting, pick from the bottom up. Bybee suggests picking them when they are about an inch in diameter because if they get any larger the flavor isn’t as good. You can usually harvest Brussels sprouts for up to eight weeks.

Brussels sprouts require fertilization when they are 6 to 8 inches tall, 12 to 14 inches tall and again when sprouts form, according to Van Dellen. For this plant you will want a 5-10-10 fertilizer.

Aphids can also be pesky, especially for Brussels sprouts. To control them, wash your plants off with a hard spray of water. According to Denham, brassicas thrive with overhead watering.

In newly developed areas that border wildlands, the county Fire Department requires builders to landscape with drought-tolerant plants to create a greenbelt around homes. According to fire officials, these stringent requirements in new areas and changes in older neighborhoods have helped reduce fire damage in in recent years.

“We haven’t lost any Orange County homes in a brush fire in the last few years, even though we had 297 vegetation fires in 1990,” says Capt. Dan Young of the Fire Department.

“By taking every precaution possible in your yard, you provide firefighters with defensible space, which will enable them to work around your home,” says Young. “While firefighters want to save as many homes as possible, they also want to survive and will only work in areas that have some space. No matter how expensive a home is, if it is overgrown with vegetation, (firefighters) will try to save another house that has a better chance of surviving.”

To provide firefighters with defensible space in landscape, remove or thin fire-prone vegetation, add fire-resistant plants, clean up dead and dying plant debris, and irrigate properly.

Eucalyptus, junipers, sumacs, some pines, cedar, cypress, chamise, red shanks, California Sagebrush, Common Buckwheat, black sage, hopseed bush and fountain grass all contain a high oil content, which causes them to explode when fire hits them, sending hot embers flying. They are especially flammable in the summer months when they sweat and emit ether.

Because of their high flammability, experts suggest removing any of these plants from within 50 feet of a home. For those fire-prone plants you choose to keep closer than 50 feet, thin them out to lessen the chance of a fire spreading, experts say.

“Keep in mind that a fire takes the path of least resistance,” says Anderson. “If fire-prone plants are close together, a fire will quickly jump from one to another. Get rid of this ladder effect by thinning out these plants and interplanting with more fire-retardant varieties.”

Make the space between the fire-prone plants the same length as their height.

Within 50 feet of a home, plant fire-retardant plants that will form a “wet zone” and stop or at least slow down an approaching fire.

There are many attractive low-growing, fire-resistant plants, including ice plants, such as delosperma alba, which has white flowers; drosanthemum floribundum, which has pale pink flowers; and lampranthus spectabilis, a highly fire-resistant plant that comes in a variety of colors.

You may also want to plant larger drought-tolerant plants, such as the strawberry tree, manzanita, Western Red Bud, New Zealand Christmas Tree, pittosporum, carob tree, pineapple guava, myoporum, oleander, pomegranate, oak, Brazilian Pepper and Cape Honeysuckle.

The location and size of the yard will determine what is planted. If you live in a fire-prone area that has some land and hillsides, Fire Department regulations state that you should have a 20-foot setback zone from the house, then 50 feet of fire-retardant plants and a 100-foot area containing some flammable plants that are well-spaced and broken up by fire-retardant vegetation.

In a conventional neighborhood that is not prone to fires and has less land, keep vegetation 10 feet from a home.

“A highly flammable plant hanging over a roof or lying against a house is a fire hazard,” says Anderson. “Not having a shake roof isn’t enough protection. Embers in the air will ignite such a plant quickly and set your house on fire.”

Arbors are covered with vine-like plants that easily attach themselves and grow seemingly without limits. “All the plants in the vine family grow well on arbors, such as ivy, wisteria, Ficus pumila and cape honeysuckle,” says Nick Federoff, co-owner of A.N.B. Industries in Whittier and a horticultural instructor at Orange Coast and Golden West colleges.

Because of their similarities, many people confuse an arbor with its modern cousin, the trellis.

“Instead of being independent structures, trellises are often attached to something,” Garton says. “They are used as facades and to grow fruits and vegetables on. Some people construct them against a wall to soften it. They also use trellises as screens for such necessary, but unattractive equipment as air-conditioning units. Others are covered with flowers such as roses and used as attention-getting backdrops.”

Trellises often take center stage in Southern California gardens because of limited space. “Many people have cigar box-size back and front yards that often don’t have room for large structures such as arbors,” Federoff says. “But they do have space for trellises.”

Trellises come in myriad shapes and sizes. “There are fan-shaped, round, horizontal and vertical ones,” Federoff says. “Those that are used as screens have latticework in them. You can even create one out of wire that will force a plant to grow across a wall.”

Marie Bouse of Santa Ana has a variety of trellises in her yard, which she uses to support fruit trees and vegetable plants. Two kiwi plants grow on a trellis that goes up the sides of her garage and across the top. In front of her dining room window is another trellis, which holds a grape vine. On summer days, she can see clusters of hanging grapes outside her window.

Bouse, who grows much of the produce she eats, has trellises in her vegetable garden that she constructs out of metal conduit pipe. “They are free standing,” she says. “I started using them because they save space by forcing plants to grow upwards.”

Trellises also add beauty to her yard. “It is very attractive and enticing to see vegetables such as tomatoes hanging at eye level, instead of being buried under green foliage,” she says. “It can add a colorful display to your garden. The fruits and vegetables are also more healthy because they stay dry and are less likely to attract pests.”

By attaching wire to them, fences and walls can have a trellis look. Bouse has grown cucumbers, tomatoes, short varieties of squash, melons, mini-pumpkins and peas on her wire-wall trellises.

Gardeners should avoid planting vine-type plants on trellises unless they want to prune them frequently.

“The plants growing on a trellis are confined to that structure,” explains Garton. “Once a plant begins to leave the trellis, either you continue to trim it, or attach it to something else, such as a wall or fence. After a time, the trellis may become useless.”

Both arbors and trellises need directional training and pruning, which varies depending on the type of plant.

“With the vinier plants, you often want to take a stray vine, bend it over and clip it to a branch that is traveling in the direction you want it to go,” Federoff says.

This can be done with garden stretch tie or clothespins. If you’ve attached a clothespin, remove it when the plant begins to grow in the right direction.

You may prefer a custom-built arbor or trellis.

The Orange County Organic Gardening Club offers members and guests educational programs, speakers and demonstrations. The group meets every second Tuesday of the month at Mercury Federal Savings in Tustin. Seventy families are members of the 25-year-old club.

Club members say you can trash the chemicals and start fresh. By using alternative pest-control methods, back-yard gardeners avoid the harmful effects of chemicals in the soil and on the produce.

“Your first line of defense against pests is to have healthy plants,” said Bud Anderson, vice president of the Organic Gardening Club. “When plants become stressed because of lack of water or nutrition or start aging, pests will attack them.”

Insects are attracted to yellow–the color of sickly plants. “Yellow means food to them,” said Sharron Clark, a professor of biology at Golden West College who will teach a class on alternative methods of garden maintenance this fall.

Problems can be prevented by selecting strong, healthy green plants. After planting, be sure to keep the area free of debris and remove any yellowing leaves or ailing plants.

Another important element to consider during plant selection is disease resistance. You can prevent infestations by choosing plants that can ward off certain devastating diseases.

When selecting tomato plants, for instance, look for the VFN label, which indicates that the plant is resistant to three main types of deadly soil-borne diseases. Seed packages also indicate that plants are resistant.

Pests thrive, too, on young, tender plants. Start seeds in containers and transplant them when they’re the size of plants found in the nursery.

“To protect transplants, put a newspaper collar around the stems,” said Clark. “This will keep cutworms and other pests away. As the plants grow, the newspaper will disintegrate.”

To mix your own, put a few drops of dish detergent into water and spray it on your plants. If you want a stronger solution, mix fresh onion juice, garlic and hot pepper into the soapy water. After some experimentation, every gardener comes up with his or her own favorite mixture.

Effective, readily biodegradable insecticidal soaps–like Safer–can be found in most gardening centers. These are designed to kill aphids, mealybugs, whiteflies, mites, tent caterpillars, thrips and other destructive pests. Spray in the early morning or late afternoon to avoid leaf burn.

Another chemical that acts as a stomach poison for beetles, thrips, weevils and borers is Rotenone, which is an extract from the roots of tropical legumes. It is usually found in a combination spray with Pyrethrum. This comes from the flower heads of the Pyrethrum Chrysanthemum, a form of the daisy found in Africa. Pyrethrum kills leaf hoppers, thrips, whiteflies and aphids.

When using organic chemical sprays, keep in mind that their effects don’t last long, which is why they don’t become part of your food. If pests persist, sprays must be reapplied.

Another form of controlling pests is through biological means. “So that we are not overrun by any one species in nature, organisms feed on one another,” said Clark. “You can use such biological controls in your own garden.”

A good cure for soil-borne pests such as pill bugs, sow bugs, snails and slugs is Diatamascious Earth. “This is made up of the shells of a small sea creature which is mined from the ocean floor,” said Anderson. “When it is mixed into the soil, the pests eat them and the sharp edges tear up their insides.”

Certain companion plants deter pests.

Plants to Watch Out For

Highly Toxic

Some plants have foliage, flowers or fruit that can be highly toxic when eaten. For a list of plants toxic to animals, call the Orange Veterinary Hospital at (714) 978-6260 or visit the ASPCA National Animal Poison Control Center’s Web site at http://www.napcc.aspca.org. Here is a list of plants that are known to be deadly to humans:

* Angel’s trumpet (Brugmansia)

* Azalea

* Carolina jessamine (Gelsemium sempervirens)

* Castor bean (Ricinus communis)

* Cestrum spp.

* Daphne

* Delphinium

* Echium vulgare

* Foxglove

* Heliotrope

* Jimson weed (Datura stramonium)

* Larkspur

* Lily-of-the-valley

* Lobelia

* Lupine

* Meadow saffron (Colchicum autumnale)

* Morning glory (seeds)

* Myoporum

* Nicotiana spp.

* Oleander

* Poison hemlock (Conium maculatum)

* Pregnant onion (Ornithogalum)

* Scilla

* Sweet pea

Less Toxic

There are many common plants that have foliage, flowers or fruit capable of producing a wide range of problems in humans such as skin rashes, painful swelling of the mouth, vomiting and diarrhea. If eaten in large quantities, some of the following plants may also cause more serious poisoning. This is not a complete list.

* Agave species

* Amaryllis

* Anemone

* Anthurium

* Arrowhead plant (Syngonium podophyllum)

* Birch tree (Betula species)

* Bird of paradise (Caesalpinia gilliesii)

* Boston ivy

* Caladium

* Calla lily

* Camphor tree

* Carnation

* Clematis

* Columbine

* Cotoneaster

* Croton

* Cyclamen

* Daffodil

* Dieffenbachia

* Elephant’s ear (Alocasia/Colocasia)

* English ivy (Hedera spp.)

* Eucalyptus

* Euonymus

* Euphorbia species

* Four o’clock (Mirabilis jalapa)

* Gladiolus

* Holly (berries)

* Hyacinth

* Hydrangea

* Iris

* Jatropha

* Jerusalem cherry (Solanum pseudocapsicum)

* Kaffir lily (Clivia spp.)

* Love-in-a-mist (Nigella damascena)

* Ming aralia (Polyscias spp.)

* Mistletoe

* Mum

* Narcissus

* Peace lily (Spathiphyllum)

* Philodendron

* Pokeweed (Phytolacca americana)

* Poppy

* Potato (green parts)

* Pothos (Epipremnum aureum)

* Primrose

* Privet (Ligustrum)

* Pyracantha spp.

* Rhubarb (leaves)

* Rubber plant (Ficus spp.)

* Sago palm

* Sansevieria

* Schefflera

* Snowflake (Leucojum spp.)

* Tobacco

* Tomato vines

* Tree tobacco (Nicotiana glauca)

* Tulip

* Umbrella plant (Cyperus alternifolius)

* Wisteria (seeds)

* Yarrow